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Give Into Peer Pressure

June 18, 2010

You know what, peer pressure just gets a bad rep. Of course, there are times when peer pressure takes the form of satan and lures you into its deep dark dungeon of no return (yes I’m in a melodramatic mood). However, there are other times that peer pressure simply forces you to grow up and crudely speaking, grow a pair. I think this depends entirely on the situation, how you deal with it and ofcourse what you learn from it.

Now when it comes to your wedding its not an understatement to say that there is a truckload of peer pressure you will be facing. And the brigade of “peers” you’re up against will include your siblings, cousins, friends, neighbors, acquaintances, and random strangers you barely know, but who seem to have very strong opinions about your wedding.

As you probably know, I took the anti-bride/‘I don’t care’ stand against this outbreak of pressure. I went along with some things ( when I didn’t want to deal with the drama), but stood dead against anything that convention or my peers deemed ‘appropriate’ for a new bride. Those were my principles and I stood by them, daymnit. In hindsight; maybe not the best approach… err oh well.


Celebrating You. Friends and relatives will want to make a big deal out of the fact that its YOUR wedding. And they will want you to bask in the glory of it. The parties and dinners in your honour might feel like a pain and an added imposition on your highly stressful life. But, for some unbeknownst reason South Asians families of the world unite in unparalleled ‘Joy’ when allowed the opportunity to celebrate for a newly wed couple. So go ahead, make their day! Schedule wisely and mark it off as a good deed to make your family and friends happy.

Traditions. Yes, some are cheesy; yes, some are crazy. But like it or not its who we are and what we were brought up with. You maybe a rebellious ‘traditions shmaditions‘ kinda girl now, but consider this; age somehow makes sentimentalists out of most of us. You don’t want to look back and think …. ‘I was being so stupid and rebellious for no reason‘. However if your family traditions are kinda out there and include virgin sacrifices and the like, I stand corrected.

Get Fit. Your wedding is the one time in your life when you have true motivation to get that lazy bum moving. Even if you don’t buy into everyone and their khala’s ridiculous obsession with weight loss, who doesn’t want to be in good shape for their wedding (not to mention the wedding photographs which live forever). This is the perfect time for you to hit a local aerobic or yoga classes. Along with the benefits of toning up (think honeymoon), and the feel-good endorphins, taking out an hour or so for yourself 3 times a week will give you a much needed breather from the shaadi madness!


Money. (/anything to do with money or things of material value). Do NOT listen to ‘friends’ who advise you on asking/demanding your ‘rights’ during the wedding. Different families have different budgets and different value systems. ‘Friends’ who tell you, you’re worth bigger diamonds, an more elaborate function, pricier jahez, a larger house, or a 8 lakh jora instead of a 2 lakh one,  are not your looking out for you. They are superficial bitches trying to make you feel shitty. Unless of course you’re also into the superficial stuff …err in which case your friends know you best…. right…?!

Fashion & Trends. I dont care what any fashion guru says, there are certain body types that should keep an arms length from certain trends!! It’s an unfortunate but true fact that Vogue and Libas don’t consult with us voluptuous types before throwing out the hippest fashions, or the latest colour palettes so dont jump into it lightly. Just because that skinny, olive skinned best friend of yours is able to pull off jeggings with a neon multi-kali angarka does not mean you can too. Know your body type and and skin-tone and go for whatever suits you best. Like I’ve said before: Fashions come and go, weddings photographs are forever!!

Your Relationship. This is a tough one! But here is the bottom line, you know your guy better than anyone else. Well, given that half our marriages are arranged, let me put it another way. You know your gut instinct better than anyone else.There is a lot of trust involved in agreeing to marry someone. Whether its trust in the guy, trust in yourself or trust in your family. When it comes to matters between you and your guy, listen to those you really trust in the matter and BLOCK OUT everyone else!

Image via here

One Comment leave one →
  1. Sarah B permalink
    July 8, 2010 8:25 am

    Couldn’t have said it better. I have read this post at least 4 times and each time it makes me feel better. So thanks:)

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