ABCs of Planning a Wedding
I know what you’re thinking, ‘Easy for you to say Laddu, YOU be calm.’ Ok, good comeback, but really I know what I’m talking about. Anxious, frantic, hysterics just get in the way of good planning. So be a good girl and take out your wedding excel sheet or your wedding organizer and lets take a look again.
If your notes are all organized and pretty and you’re in control, then move along there’s nothing here for you, (in fact you should write me a guest blog post on how you’re doing it.) If, however you don’t have it all together just yet; read on.
Here’s what we’re going to do to, we’re going to break up your planning into Shaddi Shenanigans Part I and Shaadi Shenanigans Part II (yes, as a rule, adding the word Shenanigan automatically makes things fun.)
Shaadi Shenangins Part I includes everything that you should be taking care of now. And I mean right now!
Set the date.
Picking the wedding date(s) is obviously step one in your wedding plans. OK maybe step two, after picking the lucky person you’ve decided to get married to. Keep in mind that a lot of things have to be booked months in advance, which won’t be possible unless you have a confirmed date. So consult with both your families, including siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents and of course any out of town guests that MUST be present at your wedding. This is after all a desi wedding.
Decide on Budget.
Yup, The dreaded budget. This is by far the trickiest part of any wedding, and the involvement of mummy, papa, bhaiya, behna, phuppi jaan and the in-laws, in all wedding related matters doesn’t make this any easier. Depending on who is going to be footing the bill you may or may not be included when it comes to setting the budget, but it is always a good thing to keep yourself in the loop. Desi weddings can be an elaborate affair, and random expenses can creep up on you, so make sure to account for everything in your budget manager and try (hard) to stick to the budget.
(Heres an interesting Wedding Budget Summary as well “Traditional” Breakdown of Who Pays for What I came across. I’m not sure how practical this is but I’d love to know if anyone has tried or succeeded in doing something similar.)
Prepare the Guest List.
If your wedding is as far away as December or January it might feel like a you’re jumping the gun a little early on this one, but lets face it the average desi wedding can easily include 200-1000 people. Whether its your neighbor from when you were two or your mom’s cousin twice removed, your parents are going to want to invite them all. Their rationale will simply be ‘ Well they invited us to their child’s wedding so we have to invite them’ or ‘Array they have seen you grow up since you were born, they’ll be so happy to get invited. So what if you don’t remember them, they remember you!’ Ummmm right then, no arguing that. You can see now that will take a while. So using your trusty excel sheet, encourage your parents to start making their lists from today. Divide everyone into groups such as close family, cousins, school friends, college friends, colleagues etc. If you find your guest list exceeding the limit you can cut out an entire group (like your bachpan ke teachers from elementary school). Keep in mind that this guest list will keep changing so important to start this early so that you don’t forget anyone later on.
Book it / Buy it.
Keeping your budget in mind, now is the time for the fun stuff. Researching for your outfit, jewelry and venue. Grab your best friend, cousin, or fiancé and go window-shopping! This task can be delightful or dreary depending on how tight your timeline is. As I mentioned earlier, if your designer of choice is an A-lister you will need a lot of time on your hands. My sources tell me that the snotty staff at Sana Safinaz won’t even give appointments to sneak a peak at their joras, if your wedding is anytime before May 2011. So choose wisely my friend. Pick out 4-6 designers jewelers and venues and then give yourself enough time to contact and visit each one. I know there is lot of choice out there, so try to narrow down your search early on so that you can find the right fit for your wedding.